Monday, February 27, 2012

pants

I have no butt (because I am a white male and I don't lift weights), but I have reasonably big thighs (because I am a rower and occasionally pretend to be a runner or cyclist). These two facts combined mean that no regular pair of jeans will everywhere fit correctly. Most of my pants are baggy and look silly on me, as is the typical requirement for non-movie star men (not than I am really concerned with appearance). But lately I've been really disliking the bagginess, and since I have only purchased one or two pairs of jeans in the last, oh, four or five years, I decided it was time to pants up.

So here I sit at work in a new pair of Levi's 501s, and as I should have expected, they don't fit right. The butt fit is snug (I'm now exemplifying to the world the fact that I have no butt), but the thighs are WAY TOO TIGHT, and I really should take my phone our of my pocket so that my pants don't break it in half. What is the right solution? Why don't pants fit me?

On the other hand, in a world where unemployment is high, people are dying while fighting for democracy, two friends are waging war with cancer, another fighting CF, and starvation happens at all, pants that don't fit right really doesn't even qualify as something to bitch about. I guess everything is relative. Oh well, it sounded like a funny topic in my mind.